When leaving Athens my heart broke, for more reasons than I could have ever prepared myself for. In the moments following my goodbye I experienced a helplessness I only ever remember feeling a few other times throughout my life abroad. The only way to sooth my soul that day was by putting pen to paper and expressing the pain I felt inside, the result was a free verse poem that harboured much raw emotion, the only suitable title was helpless, there was no need to sugar coat it.
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Helpless
No tears left to cry,
Nor strength to force a smile,
With resistance I dig inside.
A goodbye is just a goodbye,
What preceded it is what matters.
Hanging onto moments through appreciation.
Remembrance of everything’s temporary state,
Bringing myself to peace with this thought.
But, A goodbye IS a goodbye;
Never enough time to speak our mind,
Hold onto the last hug,
Savour the last kiss.
All alone in this moment,
Yet no one to reach out to;
No communication, No comfort,
No gentle presence letting you know it will be alright.
The moment of helplessness,
Nothing inside will put us at peace;
The moment we have no more physical, Nor mental energy,
To express the emotion we have inside.
Helpless.
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It’s what we perceive, it is in our hearts. It’s human nature, we are always greedy, wanting more……more time. The soul is what needs to feel at peace but why is it that we need the perfect goodbye to give us comfort? I’ve come to realize that quality time preceding every goodbye is what truly matters and I’ve become to appreciate every moment I have, but, the problem still lies in the moments of the last goodbye. No matter what preceded, I need this moment to last; unfortunately I’ve fallen victim to my shortest and most heartbreaking goodbye yet. Not a moment to look back. To leave with a kiss that feels only like a formality because we couldn’t have the time is a true heartbreak. No time to get lost in the moment, not a single moment before, to tell them how you feel.
Athens, Greece