Do you sometimes experience a situation in life on a repeated basis and are left asking yourself, ‘Why is this happening to me again?’. I’m sure we’ve all be there, I know it’s happened to me repeatedly. The funny thing is that we all seem to remember the so called ‘bad’ repetitions rather than the good ones. Now that’s a whole different topic I could get into but for the purpose of this post, I’ll stick to a reflection of mine on one of the prominent patterns I’ve been experiencing in my life.
I recently met the cousin of one of my good friends, who revealed some of his personal insights regarding patterns in a person’s life. At one point I shared with him how I felt about my pattern; the pattern of major life shifting obstacles every few months. I remember expressing that although I gave the impression of looking like a superwomen warrior (well let’s be honest, I am pretty bad ass strong jaja), myself as well as even the strongest of individuals have moments of exhaustion over their struggles and wonder ‘why me’ as they continue to move through their challenging patterns. I’m extremely strong but I’m not invincible to the feeling of being weak and alone; a feeling I use to experience with almost every big transition partly because I was so strongly convinced that my pattern was a force working against me. We’ve all been in, or rather should I say we’ve all put ourselves in the ‘I’m a victim phase’ and frankly, nothing positive comes from it.
Throughout my life, I’ve come to learn my pattern without fully acknowledging it’s positive influence. Constant obstacles and life changing wrenches, most of which involve me having to move countries, enter into my life every time I’ve finally find routine. Over the last year I’ve began to acknowledge and accept this pattern simply because I’ve learned that it was something that wasn’t going away; but still, I couldn’t necessarily understand why.
A simple conversation and observance of the viewpoint of an individual who was objective about my life, offered me an interpretation I could finally understand, for why I was constantly living the pattern I was; here were his insights…
He told me that my pattern in life, to be thrown in front of life shifting obstacles every time I found a solid routine, may possibly be because this pattern exists within me to prevent me from sinking into a sedentary life.
Why?
Well, although routine is a necessary stabilizer in life, apparently I thrive on a constantly changing situation. Think about it as a bacteria that thrives in an environment that normally others would die off in, maybe I’m the weirdo but who knows jaja. For some reason, I’m breathing better in an environment where others would be suffocating. Now I’m still trying to figure out whether this has been a situational adaptiation I’ve developed over the years of travelling and living abroad or it’s simply an ingrained pattern that is imbedded in me since I came to exist in this world. I’d like to think it’s a bit of both, even though the theory my friend’s cousin’s had on my life pattern seems to make sense.
I’m my happiest when I’m discovering and it just so happens that my greatest moments of discovery occur when my routine is broken unexpectedly. It’s during times such as these where I’ve learned to be grateful to my pattern because it’s in these same moments that I experience a great deal of growth. This internal growth thanks to a series of what I use to call ‘unfortunate events’ leads me to a feeling of freedom, joy, and an odd sense of stability.
Now that I’ve fully acknowledged my pattern and accepted it as a part of my life, I can work with it rather than having it work against me. Whatever your pattern in life is, I truly believe it’s important to examine it and start to see the positives it brings. Let it work for you, not against you.
Have you found what your pattern is in life?
Do you find that something keeps repeatedly popping up and you don’t know why?
Share your insights! I’d love to hear from you:)
Breathe with Intention 